Valentine's Day

Isn't the weather nice? I know that is a totally lame way to start this blog entry, but it's true! In my lifetime, the month of February has always held notoriously awful events. For some reason the dreary weather always seems to get me down one way or another. But... If all twenty eight days of February felt like today did, I think I could survive it year after year. Even though the highs were in the low forties, the sun is shining! Therefore, anything is possible.

And on this sunny February day, I worked up a sweat mucking stalls, working tirelessly on my research paper, and realized that it's Valentine's Day! I'm not sure exactly how I escaped noticing all of the gaudy heart decorations and chocolates, but somehow I did. Of course I knew the day when all the romantics in the world shamelessly surface was coming up but had no idea it was today until Wal-Mart happened. There was one and only one purpose for me being in America's superstore, and that was to get enough red food coloring for a few more red velvet cakes. But as you know, my experiences rarely turn out to be that simple.

As I was walking towards the back of the store, I passed the clothing section. You know, when you go to Wal-Mart, don't you expect the scenery to be mostly G-rated? Well.. Apparently that expectation is excused on Valentine's Day!

I was walking along, focused as could be, when I looked to my left. Bold, printed, floral lingerie. My eyes widened, not in a good way. Ew. I shook the mental thought and then continued on down the white-plastic-road. About four steps later, I happened to look to my left again. You probably have already caught onto the way this "left-looking" was going, only this time, it was worse than I ever could have imagined. There was PLUS-SIZED CHEETAH lingerie. I'm sorry, but EWW!!! I'm all about expressing your sexuality, but do we really have to do it on the end rows of Wal-mart?

I feel much better now that this information is out in cyber-world.

And now that everyone is surely interested in my Valentine's Day experiences, let me continue.

About an hour later, I was faithfully reading People Magazine while waiting to pick my little sister up from speech. Who's with who and who's not has not ever really interested me, and neither has Justin Bieber for that matter. But since it's Valentine's Day, both topics are on nearly every page. Skimming, skimming, skimming, "5 Things I Learned About Justin Bieber." Hmmm... The corresponding pictures were exactly what you would expect out of the pop-phenomenon. Sixteen year old with a big ego. Just for kicks, I decided to go along with this Bieber Fever thing and learn five things about him.

1. He's not a picky eater. He grabs a doughnut from the trash and eats pepperoni, pineapple and bacon pizza with friends.

Ok.. so you're a teenage boy.

2. He grew up around wild animals: His beloved grandfather has a taxidermied fox and wolf in his house in Canada. (Thanks to Justin and his pals, the fox now has a detached leg.)

Don't care.

3. He shaves! "I need a razor," the 16-year-old proclaims before a scene of him grooming his (seemingly) whiskerless face.

Really?

4. He's still a kid at heart. His bedding themes: the Toronto Maple Leafs (in his grandparents' home) and Spider-Man (on his tour bus).

I'll come back to this.

5. Bieber downs a green drink he calls "dinosaur pee." (Usher encouraged it.)

Usher? Where?

Ok. Now you know what I know about Justin Bieber. Except I have something to say. Take another look at number four. The boy has Spider-Man on his sheets!!! Now take a look at this picture.

Justin Bieber with Selena Gomez

Does this look like a boy who sleeps with Spider-Man on his sheets? I wonder where he would take her if they got bored with the boat... The Spider-Man sheets!!?? Sexy, Bieber...

I guess what I'm trying to say is there is a part of the male brain that never really matures past age twelve. It's just like the old man at my barn who laughs hysterically every time he refers to his horse as "CrapperBrains." Long story short, all guys possess some part of their twelve-year-old-self. It says a lot about who they used to be and still secretly are, which is not a bad thing.

Unfortunately, that is all the talk of Bieber Fever that I can handle, but I do have one last thing I would like to share with all of you.

I am an avid fan of the local radio stations. In fact, I cannot do without my music. Today, mixed in with all of the big hits were a few older love songs, no doubt for the benefit of those heartless romantics in the mood for a sappy love song. I am a big Lonestar fan. I think their music is touching, but I also think they are often overlooked. Here is the video that corresponds with not only the best song I heard all day, but a piece of art that everyone deserves to hear.

On that note, I leave you to go perfect the art of baking a flawless red velvet cake, and I hope each and every one of you dear readers has a great end to your February 14th.